Thursday, September 22, 2011
Yesterday I went to downtown Chicago to check out Roosevelt University. While we were there, my dad and I went to the Gage, another building with RU. We didn't stay long but we stopped by the gallery on the main level like a counselor suggested because it related to photojournalism, something I really hope to study. We also found the room where the school newspaper, the Torch, is made. Although it wasn't open, there was a sign in the window that barely caught my eye. It read "DON'T CALL ME ARIEL MY NAME IS HELVETICA" with a picture of Ariel, the little mermaid, on it. Bahaha. Don't get the joke? Well that's a bummer. Mrs. D, my high school publications class teacher, got a kick out of the picture like I thought she would. Oh, the joys of publications humor.
Publictaions is one of those classes that you either love or hate. I, for one, nearly cried when I found out I had to take math instead. Buh-bye AP Stats, hello publications for the third year in a row! Woo!
Due to my publications class being totally amazing, I have developed an interest in journalism and hopefully the skills for a future career in it. Sure I worked on the newspaper in middle school, but this gave a whole new meaning to it.
I've always had a love for photography whether looking at pictures or taking them, so when my french pen pal last year told me about photojournalism I was instantly hooked. This isn't an easy career but it sounds like exactly what I want. Journalism, photography, travel... What's not to like? For those of you who don't know what photojournalists do, they are photographers for sports and magazines as well as other things. They photograph athletic events and protests and even wars. That sounds exciting to me and I would get paid to do what I love.
I suppose you could say I'm a photojournalist now. I know I'm not a professional but hundreds of people see my pictures in the school newspaper and yearbook already, as well as other places. Working on the newspaper in middle school got me into my high school publications class. And that class, at the time of graduation, will be on my transcript five times out of a total of six due to the fact that you can't take this class as a freshman.
Publications class has been good to me. I learned some tips on writing, specifically regarding news, became more outgoing, met many new people, discovered I actually have some photography skills, and found what I want to do with my life. I want to learn and teach about what's happening in the world. I want my photography to be seen and not just for the image but also for the meaning behind it, the 1000 words a picture is said to be worth. Stories need to be told in any way, shape, or form, and I want to be the one to do that. I want people to stop and look at my pictures and not continue to flip through the thin pages of their magazines. I hope to be a journalist and I'm determined to be just that.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Monday, September 12, 2011
There are far too many things going on... I'm getting headaches again, feeling like I'm going to fall over I'm so dizzy. College stuff is already stressing me out and I haven't been focused on it long, especially since our internet hasn't been working right.
On top of physically feeling horrible I mentally feel the same, if not worse. Last Friday , September 9, was the three year anniversary of Ian's death. Yesterday, September 11, was the ten year anniversary of 911, the terrorist attack nearly everyone knows about. And even more, Madi died two years ago today on September 12, 2009.
I was babysitting my neighbors Gretchen and Grace when I got a phone call from my friend Terriann. She told me that Madison F. had committed suicide. I couldn't believe it. "No, no... She was a happy girl," I assured myself as tears rolled down my cheeks. The girls were scared and worried for me because they didn't know what was happening. I had to contain myself. When my friend and neighbor Heather messaged me to see if I was okay I lost it. When my family got home from dinner my mom came over to babysit so I could be with Alyssa and Heather back at her house.
That's when everything sunk in. Madi was really gone. Even though I had gone through Ian's death a year before, this day coming exactly a year after the day on which he was buried, it just wasn't the same. It couldn't be. This girl was one I had known nearly my whole life. She was in my kindergarten class with Mrs. B. and I carry around a picture of our class. We all miss her. We all love her.
I fell off my bike several years later and messed up my knee pretty bad just before Madi's birthday. I was afraid of being the only one not swimming at her party but I wanted to go because she was my friend. And as I sat by the side of the pool with my big princess Cinderella band-aid on my knee I wasn't alone. Madi was right there for me. I just wish she could have known that all these years later I was here for her.
The day before we lost Madi there was a football game. Her brother Jameson and his friend Alex, even though I was a band geek, as awesome as we are, raced over to me at the game just to see who got to high-five me first. Jameson was so happy and to know the next day he lost his big sister just breaks my heart. I see him all the time now because he's in my study hall. Madi had Chemistry with me sophomore year, but only for the first few weeks of school. I miss that class and I miss having it with her. I miss her laugh.
I recently watched our play from eighth grade. Madi was a pilgrim and she absolutely could not say Eduardo's character name, the one that started with an "S". But she nailed it when it came down to our Valentine's Day performance. It makes me sad when I watch that DVD and when I look at our Washington, D.C. pictures because she was there, but now she's not here physically.
Madi,
You'll always be with us no matter what. We'll all see you and your smiling face again one day but for now it's in our memories. You're a part of this class, my class, the class of 2012... Until we meet again, I just want to thank you for watching over me and all of my friends. Despite all the sadness I felt after your passing, I made it through. I love you, Madi. Forever in our hearts...
Rachel
There are far too many things going on... I'm getting headaches again, feeling like I'm going to fall over I'm so dizzy. College stuff is already stressing me out and I haven't been focused on it long, especially since our internet hasn't been working right.
On top of physically feeling horrible I mentally feel the same, if not worse. Last Friday , September 9, was the three year anniversary of Ian's death. Yesterday, September 11, was the ten year anniversary of 911, the terrorist attack nearly everyone knows about. And even more, Madi died two years ago today on September 12, 2009.
I was babysitting my neighbors Gretchen and Grace when I got a phone call from my friend Terriann. She told me that Madison F. had committed suicide. I couldn't believe it. "No, no... She was a happy girl," I assured myself as tears rolled down my cheeks. The girls were scared and worried for me because they didn't know what was happening. I had to contain myself. When my friend and neighbor Heather messaged me to see if I was okay I lost it. When my family got home from dinner my mom came over to babysit so I could be with Alyssa and Heather back at her house.
That's when everything sunk in. Madi was really gone. Even though I had gone through Ian's death a year before, this day coming exactly a year after the day on which he was buried, it just wasn't the same. It couldn't be. This girl was one I had known nearly my whole life. She was in my kindergarten class with Mrs. B. and I carry around a picture of our class. We all miss her. We all love her.
I fell off my bike several years later and messed up my knee pretty bad just before Madi's birthday. I was afraid of being the only one not swimming at her party but I wanted to go because she was my friend. And as I sat by the side of the pool with my big princess Cinderella band-aid on my knee I wasn't alone. Madi was right there for me. I just wish she could have known that all these years later I was here for her.
The day before we lost Madi there was a football game. Her brother Jameson and his friend Alex, even though I was a band geek, as awesome as we are, raced over to me at the game just to see who got to high-five me first. Jameson was so happy and to know the next day he lost his big sister just breaks my heart. I see him all the time now because he's in my study hall. Madi had Chemistry with me sophomore year, but only for the first few weeks of school. I miss that class and I miss having it with her. I miss her laugh.
I recently watched our play from eighth grade. Madi was a pilgrim and she absolutely could not say Eduardo's character name, the one that started with an "S". But she nailed it when it came down to our Valentine's Day performance. It makes me sad when I watch that DVD and when I look at our Washington, D.C. pictures because she was there, but now she's not here physically.
Madi,
You'll always be with us no matter what. We'll all see you and your smiling face again one day but for now it's in our memories. You're a part of this class, my class, the class of 2012... Until we meet again, I just want to thank you for watching over me and all of my friends. Despite all the sadness I felt after your passing, I made it through. I love you, Madi. Forever in our hearts...
Rachel
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
9-9-08: it was a horrible way to start off high school. We lost a friend and a classmate that day... Ian H. He was young, far too young to be done living at only 16. It's been three years since that night when he decided to end his own life. He affected so many people positively, which everyone who was in band at the time would know.
9-10-08: there was a bad feeling all over the school that morning. I remember I was standing outside of the French room waiting for Mrs. K.- Miss P. at the time- when a girl walked by me crying. Feeling clueless, I asked somebody if they knew what had happened. "I don't know. Some guy named Ian committed suicide," was similar to their response. My heart sank. "Ian? Ian H.?" I questioned. "Yeah, him!" was the reply I received, but it wasn't the answer I wanted. No one wated this to happen.
But unlike my classmate I know Ian H. Not only that, but he was also one of my brother's best friends. And they were supposed to hang out on 9-10, the day after a young life was taken.
9-9-11: I sit here today in my Ian memorial t-shirt, orange with a blue and white outlined "I", for the University of Illinois, but with an added "an" inside for his first name while his last name graces the back. Whenever I see "H." written in those bold letters I am reminded of baseball and how the boys' last names would be written across the backs of their jerseys. That makes me happy because that's how I met Ian: through sports.
As Mr. M has told us before, when days like this roll around we need to remember all of the good memories of Ian we have. So every year I think back to 9-10-08, specifically band class when we sat together for a whole class period telling stories of the veloved drummer. Even though not everyone knew Ian or that he was even in band, they cried with us. And not just because the death of a 16 year old is tragic no matter what. They realized that Ian wuold be remembered forever.
Despite all the good things in life you can get down time after time. Later that year I found the song "Life Left to Go" by a band called SafetySuit. And like the name, they give safety. Listening to this song more than any other one and sharing it with many of my friends for years, I wonder whether it would have helped Ian through whatever it was he was going through.
"Sometimes the edge serves as more than a friend than you thought it would be. And the pages you write in your journal each night are your only release. And the mask you put on, it's like words in a song but there's more to be seen. And the failures you see don't seem failues to me here at all..."
Was someone there to play that song for Ian? I don't know. But I promise to share that song, like I'm doing now, just in case I come across even one person who may benefit from it.
We love you, Ian. Rest in peace...
9-9-08: it was a horrible way to start off high school. We lost a friend and a classmate that day... Ian H. He was young, far too young to be done living at only 16. It's been three years since that night when he decided to end his own life. He affected so many people positively, which everyone who was in band at the time would know.
9-10-08: there was a bad feeling all over the school that morning. I remember I was standing outside of the French room waiting for Mrs. K.- Miss P. at the time- when a girl walked by me crying. Feeling clueless, I asked somebody if they knew what had happened. "I don't know. Some guy named Ian committed suicide," was similar to their response. My heart sank. "Ian? Ian H.?" I questioned. "Yeah, him!" was the reply I received, but it wasn't the answer I wanted. No one wated this to happen.
But unlike my classmate I know Ian H. Not only that, but he was also one of my brother's best friends. And they were supposed to hang out on 9-10, the day after a young life was taken.
9-9-11: I sit here today in my Ian memorial t-shirt, orange with a blue and white outlined "I", for the University of Illinois, but with an added "an" inside for his first name while his last name graces the back. Whenever I see "H." written in those bold letters I am reminded of baseball and how the boys' last names would be written across the backs of their jerseys. That makes me happy because that's how I met Ian: through sports.
As Mr. M has told us before, when days like this roll around we need to remember all of the good memories of Ian we have. So every year I think back to 9-10-08, specifically band class when we sat together for a whole class period telling stories of the veloved drummer. Even though not everyone knew Ian or that he was even in band, they cried with us. And not just because the death of a 16 year old is tragic no matter what. They realized that Ian wuold be remembered forever.
Despite all the good things in life you can get down time after time. Later that year I found the song "Life Left to Go" by a band called SafetySuit. And like the name, they give safety. Listening to this song more than any other one and sharing it with many of my friends for years, I wonder whether it would have helped Ian through whatever it was he was going through.
"Sometimes the edge serves as more than a friend than you thought it would be. And the pages you write in your journal each night are your only release. And the mask you put on, it's like words in a song but there's more to be seen. And the failures you see don't seem failues to me here at all..."
Was someone there to play that song for Ian? I don't know. But I promise to share that song, like I'm doing now, just in case I come across even one person who may benefit from it.
We love you, Ian. Rest in peace...
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